Rambling Raphy L.


Best of: I heART you
October 2, 2008, 3:11 am
Filed under: Best of, Daily Life

Originally posted on: Sunday, January 27, 2008 at 12:22AM

I *heART* You

I’ll admit, I’m not having the best weekend.  I’m sick again…I missed out on teaching my Children’s Arts and Crafts and I feel rotten about it.  Today, we were suppose to build robots and castles.  I guess that will have to wait next weekend.

This weekend leaves me to polish up some pieces for next week.  The Labyrinth is holding a show next month and I thought I should submit some work.  Dan, the owner, is having a bunch of artist design on old vinyl record sleeves.  I’m working on one and I may work on another.  It really depends if I have time considering I got a bunch of assignments to deal with and my spidey senses tell me more projects are to come.  Not necessarily a bad thing.  I rather be busy and bored.

Despite having a lot on my plate, I still make time to take a nice break here and there (like right now as I write this entry).  I look forward to Sundays.  It’s quiet in the house and I tend to get more done.  I like tuning in Canada’s Premier Jazz Station and listening to songs I never heard before.  I like it when they put on a vinyl and you can hear the pops in the song.  I dunno, I like little things like that.

I try to make time for other things like reading for pleasure.  I’m currently reading Native Speaker by Chang-Rae Lee.  It’s pretty good.  Lee touches on themes that remind me some of Adrian Tomine’s work.  However, it’s not restricted to Asian American lifestyle.  One passage caught my attention.  The protagonist talks about saying the phrase “I love you.”  He talks about the different meanings tied to those three words:

I never felt comfortable with the phrase, had a deep trouble with it, all the ways it was said.  You could say it in a celebratory sense.  For corroboration.  In gratitude.  To get a point across, to instill guilt in your lover, to defend yourself.  You said it after great deliberation, or when you felt reckless.  You said it when you meant it and sometimes when you didn’t.

It got me thinking of the phrase “I love you”.  I’ll admit, I have trouble saying it.  When someone says it to me, I tend to nod and say “cool”.  When I say it, it comes out like a fart.  I blurt it out and the other person looks shock like a deer in the head lights.  I guess everyone’s like that too.  To be honest, I never really like the sound of it.  I think it’s been over used that it sounds kinda boring and even unromantic.  I kinda like how the French say it, “je t’aime”.  In Tagalog (my native tongue that I don’t speak too well), you say it as “mahal kita”.  I find this confusing.  Let’s say “mahal” means love (while “kita” means you).  To say something is really expensive, you would say it as “mas mahal”.  However, you can translate it to literally mean “more love”.  So, to love someone you have to spend a lot money too?  And then there’s how to say “I love you” in Korea.  You would look into their eyes and say “sarang hae yo”.  I need to confess, I really like the way it sounds when I hear it.  I guess I like hearing “sarang”.  Something about it sounds kinda poetic.  When you say it, it’s like a nice wave.  It’s as if when you say it, the word travels in the air and into your lover’s ear.  It’s like a breeze.  Now reality.  I don’t think I’ll ever get the chance to say it to someone and mean it.  I can go on about relationships about Asian couples who aren’t from the same country but that’s what Chang-Ree Lee and Adrian Tomine are there for.  I know one of my friends who taught me how to say “sarang hae yo” is gonna give me a talk and tell me to stop being pessimistic.  In the end, I’ll argue that’s how my glass looks and I’m being realistic.  So, how do you say “I love you” in your language?

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